MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! I hope that everyone was good this year and they got what they wanted. Yesterday I went to my dad's side of the family and I had to go to work on thirds. I guess that's what happens when you work at a place that never shuts down. Anyways I had a great time with my family. Today I have my mom's side and IM OFF WORK!! I really don't want anything particular for christmas because I have alot of family members with cancer who could be knocking on death's door right now but they are not and I am very grateful that they are here now and I hope that they are here next year as well. Though I am jealous of those who get a white christmas. -.- In Kentucky all we get is rain....Anyways please stay safe if you get out or if you are drinking. It's ok to stay the night or call for a ride. Just don't be stupid. Well I must get some rest I have a busy day. Again Merry Christmas DA!

You know as I returned to DA after my leave for what was months though I dont know how many I came back being active on here again. Which is fine im working on some new stuff but at the same time it really sucks. I really dont know how to explain it or get it off my chest without exposing the whole thing. Im not one to share personal problems with the world though some on here may know exactly what I'm talking about. Anyways I lost someone on here that was pretty important to me and the more I think about it the more it bothers me. Not like cry idk like I miss talking to them here, on the phone, and a couple other places. If you haven't figured it out already he's a guy. When I left I really didn't give anyone a reason or closure for my leaving I just simply left. And to that one person I should not have done that but I did so that was my mess up. I take all the blame for that. Anyways yea me and the guy did date if your asking me that by now. We were really into one other talked all the time and share intament conversations with one another. It even went as far as saying I love you which is a phrase not to be played with or thrown around. Well when I returned things changed for the not for brighter side. Did I expect him to just wait and see if I'd come back? No but in the same breath we had each others phone numbers and could have talked that way. I never called him because I didn't want to get him in trouble with his parents. I particularily did think they knew of our relationship. I dont know I just think theres so unsaid things between the two of us and some unclosed business. I can't take back what happened and all I can say is I'm sorry. But you know if you really truly love someone to the bottom of your heart those feelings just dont go away and you just dont lose them no matter what. And I know this for a fact because I loved two men in my life (not at the same time) with every being in me and i still love them both even though we aren't together and there's not a thing in this world that I wouldn't do for them. So just to say 'ive moved on and the feelings went away' and telling me you love me just doesnt sit right with me. I don't know if it makes sense to anyone else but it does me and it helps just to ramble on in a journal to get it off your chest.

Wow I've been gone so long that I don't even think people would rememeber who I am now. lol I really dont know why I left in the first place other than it seems that my life hit the highway and just took off. I miss alot of people here and submitting my art what little I can do. I believe I've even broken hearts on here which is sad to say. I can only say I'm truly sorry to one person and he knows who he is. I do miss you and have even thought about calling your house several times though I don't think your mother would like someone calling from another state. I even still have your gift sitting on my mantel which reminds me of you everyday. Hopefully I can still find the time in my day to come and talk to people here.
I have a new job now. I work at a nursing home as a CNA. It's hell not because I hate the job but because the company makes it unpleasurable. I miss bath and body works horribly.
College is college with lots of work and studying to be done. I'm going to school to be a nurse.
I'm sure I could put alot of things here at the moment but im pretty tired and I have class in a few hours. I'm sure you'll be hearing from me again soon.

So I started my summer class today which surprisingly I believe I am going to enjoy. I have like 24 days of it. I'm just very woried about our research paper. I am a very weak writer and I don't believe I'm going to do to well on it. The topic for the class is Marriage and Family. Which is very interesting because I didn't think it would be that. So I have two ideas about what I'm going to write about. I don't know if I should write about what effects does divorce have on familie or what effects does a loved one being in the military have. I'm really leaning towards the military but I'm not sure. I don't know which one would have more of a selcetion of imformation for me to use. I just thought I would throw that out there for you guys. If you any ideas what so ever or think you might be able to help me please let me know.

Yes that's righ I've come to ask for some help on the internet. Let's see I have a college class starting tomorrow. It's English 102 and I suck terribly at writing. I was wondering if like someone could like tutor me over the internet and review the things that I write for the class. I would prefer to do it through email because I really don't want to post my calss work here for everyone to see. So if you or anyone you know could really help me or if you are a whiz in English I'm on my knees asking for help. Thanks..